The Dream That Almost Cost Me Everything — and the System That's Designed That Way
By Dr. Rene Roberts, MD, MS, FAAFP | TEDx & Keynote Speaker | Board-Certified Family Medicine Physician
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The first rejection letter didn't break me.
Neither did the fifth. Or the fifteenth.
By the time I received my fiftieth rejection from a medical school, I had stopped counting what I was losing and started asking a different question altogether.
Why is this system designed to make this so hard?
Not hard in the way that anything worth having is hard. Hard in a way that is specific, targeted, and financially punishing — a system that filters out dreamers before they ever reach the door, not because they lack the heart to heal, but because they can't afford to try.
That is the story behind "Who Gets to Heal?"
And it starts long before anyone steps onto a red circle.
Fifty Letters. Two Years. One Question.
Most people hear "50 rejections" and think about the emotional weight of it. And yes — that weight is real. I will not minimize it.
But what does not get talked about enough is the financial weight.
Every application cycle costs money. Real money. The kind of money that, if you are working two jobs to pay for your pre-med prerequisites, or sending home a portion of every paycheck to help your family, or doing the math on whether you can afford to take an MCAT prep course or just have to figure it out alone — that money is not theoretical.
The average cost to apply to medical school in 2024 was approximately $7,319. That includes application fees, MCAT registration, secondary applications, and interview expenses. And that number assumes you only apply once. (Inspira Advantage, 2024)
Seven thousand, three hundred and nineteen dollars.
Just to be considered.
I applied twice.
The Cost Nobody Puts in the Brochure
Here is what I want you to understand about the students who never make it into the pipeline at all.
They are not the ones who tried and failed. They are the ones who looked at the math and never got to try in the first place.
Research shows that MCAT scores are positively correlated with family income — not because wealthier students are smarter or more deserving, but because they can afford the preparation courses, the practice tests, the tutors, the luxury of studying without also working a full-time job. Students from families earning over $100,000 were 54% more likely to enroll in a paid MCAT prep course than those from lower-income households. (PMC, 2023)
That gap does not reflect ability.
It reflects access.
And the students most affected — first-generation students, students from underrepresented communities, students who grew up in the very zip codes that are most medically underserved — are the ones who carry the experiences, the empathy, and the cultural fluency that medicine needs most.
They are being filtered out by a system that was never designed with them in mind.
What I Felt Standing on That Red Circle
When I gave my TEDx talk in March, I said something that I have believed for a long time but had never said out loud on a stage before.
The qualities that make someone a truly great physician — empathy, resilience, lived experience, the ability to sit with a frightened patient and make them feel less alone — do not show up on a transcript or a multiple choice exam.
The room shifted when I said it. I could feel it.
Because the people in that audience — patients, caregivers, clinicians, educators — they already knew this. They had lived it from both sides of the exam table. They had been the patient who felt dismissed, or the doctor who entered medicine because of a wound that never fully healed, or the parent who watched their child fight to get into a system that kept saying no.
During intermission, a line formed.
Strangers waited to tell me about the doctor who dismissed their symptoms for years. About watching a husband feel invisible as he battled cancer. About what it means to sit in an exam room and feel like a number instead of a human being.
These were not abstract policy conversations.
These were wounds.
And they were being shared with me because something in that talk had touched a place that needed to be touched.
This Is Bigger Than My Story
I share my fifty rejections because they are mine to share. But I also share them because I know I am not the only one — and because the students still fighting their way through this system deserve to see that the door does not have to be the end.
What I want people to understand about "Who Gets to Heal?" is that it is not just about admissions policy. It is not just about test scores and GPA cutoffs.
It is about who ends up in the exam room with you when you are sick, scared, and hoping someone will truly see you.
The doctor who understands your community because they came from it. The physician who knows what it means to fight for something because she fought for fifty rejections' worth. The healer whose lived experience makes them not just competent — but connected.
That is who we risk losing when the system only opens its doors to the best-resourced, not the most qualified.
What Comes Next
This is the second post in a series about the road to the TEDx stage — and about the urgent, unfinished work the talk represents.
Next up: The Systemic Problem — the algorithmic gatekeeping built into medical school admissions, and what the data reveals about who it is really designed to keep out.
If you are an aspiring physician who has ever been told you do not fit the mold — keep reading. This series is for you.
If you are a patient who has ever felt unseen in a medical setting — this series is for you too.
And if you are a leader, an educator, or a decision-maker who wants to understand what it really means to build a healthcare system that works for everyone — you are exactly where you belong.
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Dr. Rene Roberts, MD, MS, FAAFP is a board-certified Family Medicine physician, Fellow of the American Academy of Family Physicians, Castle Connolly Top Doctor (2024 & 2025), and TEDx & keynote speaker. Creator of the L.Y.M.I.T.S. Method™, she is a nationally recognized medical media expert and leading voice in healthcare equity, medical education reform, and resilience. She mentors aspiring physicians through the Urban Bridges Medical Mentoring Program.
Speaking inquiries: Book Dr. Rene to Speak Follow along: @drrenemd www.drrenemd.com
